I'm sure there would be a better feminist who could write this,
but this is just a try.
but this is just a try.
Fall in love with a feminist. Date a girl who spends more money on books and travels instead of clothes. You'll recognize her with her grace amidst simplicity. She has her own definition of fashion. She would never abide by the common notion nor of the societal image of beauty, since she is beautiful as she is, on her own nature. Her psyche of beauty is more than the physique, but of bringing out the best of a woman in her.
Fall in love with a feminist who accepts that you both only have the 'now'. She would never be a nagger, or would consciously try not to be one. She accepts that the present is a product of the past, and that the future depends greatly with the present. Because, somewhere inside her, she accepts that all things will come to an end. That, if you fail her, she'll understand that it's just a man's societal upbringing that made her into a man of lesser human than he is. That when he sees you're willing to take chances with her, she will help you understand that the world was made for both men and women, and that the burden MUST not solely be with men.
You can always make mistakes with feminists. You can always be as deviant for she is open-minded. She might even squat with you in the aisles when there are no more benches, or chase after the bus when both of you are running late. She wouldn't give up on late night dialogues just to thresh-out issues that are impeding the happiness for the both of you. You never have to be Mr. Perfect, for she knows that every person is in constant struggle for personal development.
She believes that 'the girl worth having won't wait for anybody'. She would never depend her happiness solely with you, but with her friends and family too. And that is the reason behind her sanity. She understands that happiness is a choice to be made, and not to retrieved from people around her.
Fall in love with a feminist because when you're with her, the world is in constant spontaneity. She is not suddenly affected by bad vibes nor get irritated with simple shortcomings. She might even accompany you in the train ride to pick-up your brother, just to make your night feel fine. She would not mind travelling hours more than you, just so the both of you could meet. She would not mind of you being late, just as long as you have a good reason for it. For in her mind, she understands that it is in two-ways of give and take, that love would work.
When you date a feminist, ask her if she wants to run, play soccer or ride the unicycle, just as much as you do. Ask her to learn how to play the guitar or find the right piano keys with you. Ask her not to be afraid of riding the roller coaster, or of the horse, or of the bicycle that has only one wheel. She would not mind doing hobbies of your interest, for inside her is also partly-a-man who likes adrenaline rush. She would be willing to share her time with you, with the things you love, and find beauty in those times as she appreciates you bringing her into your own world.
It's easy enough to fall in love with a feminist, contrary to the belief of some that it's difficult. She would argue with you when you try to grab her bag from her and lend her a hand, but in the sense that she too can do things on her own. She wouldn't mind if you don't pay for her meals nor her fares on a date because she understands that she is not your own responsibility. She is also trying to make things light for you.
You don't have to buy anything for a feminist, for she doesn't live in a material world. She might hate it when you set your hang-outs with her on a mall, for she appreciates being at the outside world, and be close to nature more. Conversations, debates and sharing interests is what she would want to spend more time with, rather than shopping or catching movies weekly. She appreciates gifts that you made on your own, or the poem or song you wrote especially for her. She wouldn't appreciate the latest trends of shoes nor of dresses as a gift, but the quality of time you spent together. Love, for her, is understanding between two people, that only the two of you could understand.
You don't have to buy anything for a feminist, for she doesn't live in a material world. She might hate it when you set your hang-outs with her on a mall, for she appreciates being at the outside world, and be close to nature more. Conversations, debates and sharing interests is what she would want to spend more time with, rather than shopping or catching movies weekly. She appreciates gifts that you made on your own, or the poem or song you wrote especially for her. She wouldn't appreciate the latest trends of shoes nor of dresses as a gift, but the quality of time you spent together. Love, for her, is understanding between two people, that only the two of you could understand.
If she says she loves you, take her word for it. It is not easy for a feminist to find the guy she likes. She doesn't want to waste time on someone else who is close-minded and is not willing to listen with what she wants to say to the world. When those words come out from her, it is for a life time. Both of you might have misunderstandings in the long run, but she is more than willing to work it out with you, always. She keeps her words, just as much as she value the few true people she met in her life.
Love a girl who speaks her mind and heart, just to make things clear for the both of you. And when she asks for space, let her be. She just wants to sort-out things on her own, and get back to you with the understanding she has made on her own. She does not depend her life's decisions on others, but on her own. Thus, she needs her own time, just to be the person worthy of you.
You both have to give it a shot, somehow.
Find a girl to love that is a feminist, and the world would have been a better place to live in.
Inspired by Date a Girl who Travels by Aleah
