that I am scared of man generally~

but not all. Okay. So maybe drunken ones but I'm not scared of my friends who get drunk.

Title rephrased: I'm scared of  "tambays".

Tambays are people who get drunk on the streets, pathways and corridors in the streets of Manila.

Here was the situation. I got lost on my way home and the only one who was there that could help was a drunk guy. I didn't need his help but anyway, there's someone who asked him to go with me. And I think it was a stupid decision because.. on the way, he was asking my number, was asking my age, and was asking if he could hold my hand?!!! And to be left in a house alone with him on the outside, this is scaring me to death.

Even though how much I talk and act to him cooly, close to being irrespectful, I think - there he was. And though how much I think of the theories of feminism - there he was - a product of centuries of machismo which cannot be easily daunted, changed and slapped in the face. I don't want to live in this kind of world but rather a world where women were respected and treated equally as a human being and not just a sex object.

the difference between job and career.

If you call what you do for a living a job..
you work from 9am - 5pm as expected of you,
and always wanted for the hours to pass faster,
you start your day "here goes a day again",
and you get bored in a meeting. D:

If you call what you do for a living, a career..
you work from 9am - 8pm without bothering about overtime,
and is always surprised how time easily passed by while you were doing a task,
you start your day "another day has begun",
and you enjoy sitting, discussing and planning in a meeting.

Because in the first months, I was a person who had a job but now I think I now found a career.
And these examples were how I worked - then and now.
To have this paradigm shift (Social work term) or change of mind (layman's term), amazes me.

that life is an echo, as well as it is an ice cream~

"Life is an echoe.
It gives you back everything you say or do.

Our life is simply a reflection of our actions."

 ~ Katsutoshi Kojima

When I sent e-mail to my Japanese friend (who is also a volunteer of ACCE), yahoo mail automatically pasted my signature "Life is an ice cream, eat it before it melts." I like this quote because I love ice cream and I love life, so I personally believe that I should not let my life pass me by and spent it in "useful" acts. D: I heard this from the movie "Black", a movie about a mentally-disabled person who tried her very hard to graduate in a university with her teacher (since childhood) always beside her. For the first time that she typed (in a typewriter especially for made for the blind) in a fast rate, her professor asked her to celebrate by eating ice cream. Her mother wondered and the teacher said "Life is an ice cream, eat it before it melts".

Apparently, the quote also touched Koji. :D And he replied with another explanation of life through metaphor. He said he learned this from the people in Cambodia. Life gives us back everything we say or do.. so learning from this I must say and act what I wanted to be said on me or acted towards me - similar to the golden rule.
 

What will you get back after helping other people?
Most compassionate people do not ask for something in return,
yet they receive a much greater gift in the end,
which commonly, becomes their most treasured.

that Dory was right~

when she told Marlin to "JUST KEEP SWIMMING", on their impossible journey to find Nemo.

To look back in the past is good but just look back and learn from it, never regret your decisions and never forever ponder on what could have been if one has done that or has not done this. It will make one's life complicated. Looking back, I too had thought of regret that I can never bring back the past again because of my sudden decision. But I didn't turn back, I just kept walking ahead. I may have lost friendship and trust of other people but I have to move on. There are reasons why there are only few grains of sand left in your hand as you walk farther along the shore. One may never know the reason, it's just is.

And.. in one's decision, not all may agree, others may question. Others may change how they may look at you but don't fret. As long as one knows, he or she is happy with the decision, one must continue. I cannot be friends with all. I cannot be liked by all. We are individuals with different tastes, with different personalities and with different preferences that is why there would always be persons who would never jive in with each other at a given place, at a given time and at a given situation. Maybe~ D:

So from now, whatever difficulty I may face of whatever happens, I will just thinking most likely like Dory. Anyway, my brother already told me that he sees me as Dory. "Just keep swimming~".

Hmmm. And Ending Song of Skip Beat is quite related (but it's quite mixed up with the love story but still it's about 'just keep swimming') with this blog post so I wanna share Namida by 2BACKKA. Here is lyrics and here is the song. :)

that feelings towards friends never change~

When I get to see my friends (my block mates) again after 4 months, I felt the same kind of happiness that I felt months back. Funny jokes, unrespectful and honest yet friendly remarks towards one another, taking wacky pictures spontaneously  and more was nostalgic. It seemed like nothing has changed. That's good. Errrr except for us being workers now and for new updates about love stories. :)

Dinner at Bacolod Chicken Inasal with
Ariel, Clang, Jeany, Korina, Lian, Lani and Teresa.
More memories captured in photos here. Click!
 

And.. I learned to love walking because it makes your time with a friend longer and you get to share stories more. I always loved walking with Lani and she feels the same way. While walking, she advices me about my decisions, shares interests with me which makes me want to talk to her more. And last night while we walked to the bus station, I told her scenes from a love story that she told could be made into a movie. It is the first time that she is happy about her friend's love story. I am glad. ^_^
 

When one is with friends, one will always be happy. ^___^ I don't want to end the day even. The miracle of friendship makes me wonder more than I wonder about the "7 wonders of the world."

 

that to be contented in the present is enough~

And to worry about the future, specifically your future is not much of an importance right now.

Or so I thought, or so what I want to think so. D:

I never felt more contented with my life as I am experiencing now. Though, I can say my money is not enough for my needs and I still could be labeled as "homeless" because I remain to be of no permanent address, I am happy with it. In fact, I now want to experience difficulty, learn from it and be motivated to do something to change the difficulty than what I previously thought. I think was far too lazy in the past because I wasn't doing the best effort I can in doing my work. I was addicted to Flyff then and the only thing I wanted to do day by day, was sleep or play Flyff.

Little Children Scavengers (SM2)

In just seconds things change. There was a point in time where in my mind there was only darkness and light and after that, my mind started questioning about what I do day by day, which values I treasure, which was important. Especially when I was exposed to SM2's poverty and experience their difficult life situation, it was like enlightenment though it may sound grand, but I don't have any way to explain it. Now, I care less about games and all other things I was acquainted to that now I see as unimportant.

It's a strange feeling to feel this way - to wake up early and not feel lazy but instead want to start work immediately and maximizing all the time to do advocacy, education and any other work to help ACCE.

In the future, I don't know where I will be. I don't know how poor or how rich I am but I don't seem to be anxious... if it's only for myself. The problem will come if I have my own family but then.. let's go back to the first sentence I scribbled in this blog. I don't want to worry about my future so much as long as I am contented with the present.

POSTSCRIPT:
Please support victims of Typhoon Ondoy and Typhoon Pepeng. See ACCE's relief operation flyer here. Click!

how times of crisis create venues of compassion and cooperation

by being a volunteer of World Vision's relief operation for a day.

The volume of donations received in cash and in kind of World Vision is amazing. From the vies of an outsider, they could easily implement relief operation without spending any penny from their fund since they already have many supporters. BUT, it was more heart-touching and wonderful to see people coming in to spend their day also as volunteers as seen in this picture..

It amazes me when people act to help others with no special reason
or with no agenda of receiving something in exchange in the end.

What I did today was so much different from what I originally expected - that is to go to Marikina and see how bad the typhoon's damage was with my eyes. In the end, I stayed with Gifts-In-Kind (GIK) team in the main office and counted donated food, toys and clothes per piece. It was a tiring day but I was glad to have found new friends. I am thinking of doing volunteer work for World Vision as a day care teacher maybe. As long as I have to deal with children would be fun with me - it's my pleasure~ ^_^

that perseverance can melt any kind of hindrance~

"Kung ayaw may dahilan. Kung gusto naman, maraming paraan" ~ Antukin, Rico Blanco

That was what I realized after spending a night with my seminarian friends at the Multi Purpose Health Center (MPHC) of Smokey Mountain 2. In the morning, we were asked what we want to do, either to stay at home because of the bad weather condition or continue going to Smokey Mountain and spend the day. We decided to go.

Redemptorist Seminarians with Smokey Mountain 2 (SM2) youth.
More pictures in here. Click!.

Though we had difficulty riding jeepneys, got our feet soaked in the dirty flood, struggled with our weak umbrellas easily tattered by the strong and finally, being in a confusion of weather to stay overnight or not, we still went on. Sharing ilfe experiences with poor people under a worst condition was far better than staying in the comfort of one's home worrying about them. In that night, I was able to hear life stories of the youth of Smokey Mountain. I want to take more action so as to prevent another youth to be given less a chance to experience life as a youth in its fullness.

that plans may change, be ready for anything~

"As much as you want to plan your life, it has a way of surprising you with unexpected things that will make you happier than you originally planned." - Lyra, 06/02/09

 

For example..
You plan to eat on Jollibee... errr I planned to eat in KFC for dinner tonight but the line was too long. I was very hungry and wanted to eat as soon as possible so I went to the stall beside KFC in Gateway's Foodcourt. The stall sells dumplings! In the end, I paid about 20 pesos less than the meal I already plan to eat and I discovered that Dumpling's strawberry iced tea is delicious! I 

Another one...
For so many years, one may have stayed in a relationship with someone she thought she loved. Yet, everyday, she thinks that there is something missing despite the current stability. And then in one sudden moment, she forgets about the years they shared as she met another guy who for some reason, felt like his 'Mr. Right". So she breaks up with Boyfriend for Long Years and for the next years, she never felt more happy! Actually, I hope this happy ending happens to me~ I pray so~

In my last year in college, I discovered the profession I really wanted to be part of - to be a doctor for children! BUT, after four months from being a fresh graduate from university, my plan has changed. Today's dream is more simple, more easy to reach, more fulfilling - I dream for more people to take action against poverty! In this light, I want to be professor of Social Work in the university to help students realize what I realized - and to feel what great happiness I feel in helping poor people presently. and simultaneously, continue being staff of ACCE-Philippines - a lifetime commitment, if I can. ^__^ I

that lacking sleep is better than sleeping all day~

because I've always been a deep sleeper, I never knew what I was missing. Last night, we spent time with Fine Interaction Team, ACCE-Japan Supporting team for Smokey Mountain. It was not a formal event but more like get-together of friends. While I was asleep, Tomomi, Koji and Shohei shared life stories which I regret not hearing. I could have learned more about them, understand them more and improve friendship but I was asleep.

So from now on, I will always try to make the most out of time because you never knew how important each minute is when it''s already too late as hours already passed.

And from now, I will change this blog to "what I learned today?" to keep it simple and so that I could easily write everyday. I missed you blog. Sorry, I was busy with the tour and summer camp. ^__^

5 second poem~

CHASing after you, I believe I'll always be.
Even though, often it's only your back, I see.
But I don't mind and you will never mind.
The magic you've done, only time will find.

It was all too sudden - knowing you.
Compatibility level suddenly went through.
Just like my poem, just like your haiku.
Writing is easy because of you~

hope the pictures will say it all. :D

Due to my work schedule, I've always been too tired to write when I get home. There are sentence formed on my way home yet when I sit in front of the laptop in the last hours of my day, I can't help but spend it on plain leisure like playing Flyff or drooling over anime. xD

Just want to save this photos from the places I've been to recently.



"Dalampasigan" (shot taken from Perez, Quezon)



"Tahanan" (also from Perez, Quezon)




"Demolisyon" (photo taken from Smokey Mountain 2)

Oyasumi Nasai~ :)

more than being a crybaby~

Sometimes, I cry even when there is no reason and sometimes I feel glad but tears start to fall down on my cheeks. One instance was yesterday when me and my block-mates talked about love. The topic started at cliché-questions - what is your ideal guy? Then, it went to deeper topics such as - "for I've seen love die so many times, that even the longest years of relationship could also come into end". To prove this Ate Clang asked if I see Jeric as the one I would marry. I was quite unsure of what I would answer. I told them "I wouldn’t want to think about it yet, I want to love him as where we are right now because I don't want to get trapped again by thinking too much of the future and of marriage while in turn, our relationship would end."

 

"It depends on the reason why you enter into relationships. Coming from a Catholic point of view, I want to have a boyfriend who I expect to be my husband. If that isn't your reason then what is?", asked Ate Clang.

 

A moment of silence surrounded us. Disrupting this moment, I talked my heart out. "Even if I can say I'm in loved with Jeric, I can't say I had totally moved on with what happened with my past pseudo-boyfriend. Jeric knew that and..even when I start to cry because of the past, he listens and comforts me." I cried. They wondered. "It's just that I can't help but cry when I remember how Jeric treats me and is so good to me."

to start living at the "now"

I've been pondering on why I feel so lazy or rather sleepy today but I can't figure it out. I've slept rather early last night at around 10 in the evening and was fighting with myself to get up this morning by 8:30. These lazy days have come more often now that I've finished my studies and graduated. I feel like my life has passed me by and that there is nothing left to do since I've been there-done that. I don't like what I feel but I don’t know how to rub off these thoughts and feelings. I'm just waiting for this day to end so that another days starts. Maybe tomorrow will be better.

 

 And yes I've grown tired of waiting. I think all my life, I've spent most of my time waiting. I waited for Mama at school so that I'll watch Doraemon or Bananas in Pajamas after.  I waited for Papa to go home unexpectedly from his job in Sorsogon so that he, Ian and I could go bike-riding in parks or swimming at the 3-minute walk beach in our barangay. I waited for Ian to finish playing Flyff so that I too could play. I waited for myself to finish high school then finish college. I wait for the MRT. I wait for my friends. I wait for Papa to come home. I wait for Ian to finish high school so that our family could live together again here in Manila. I wait for Saturdays with Pika to come so that I'll be able to spend a day happily and when that days is over, I wait again. Now, I think I'm waiting for my new life as a social worker to start, a new life as a daughter living with her family, a new life as a woman fighting for the equality of men and women, a new life as a mother and wife implementing social work principles in family life. Maybe, it's better for me to stop waiting and start living now.

while in a line of crowded people, I LOLed~

A very funny text message from TJ, who was waiting for me in Trinoma for about an hour:

 

"Asan ka na? Malayo pa ba? Wag kang mapressure, nagtatanong lang."

(Where are you? Would it take long before you'll arrive? Don't get pressured, I'm just asking.)

 

Lol. :D

back to being human~

I think I could never have been able  to taste such sweet day with nothing to do if I have not spent the past whole month burying myself in studying and getting prepared for the board exam.

I spent the last two days in Manuel L. Quezon University with my friends who are also to become professional social workers after the 'right of passage'. But before that, we attended the  week long review classes at the university guided by professors we had from 1st year college and I felt that it was in those days that we were able to strengthen our group's cohesion. A friend was really glad that we stay together most of the time now than we were before. I will miss the block~ I will not be able to see them everyday unlike last month and the last 4 years when I expect to see them in class almost everyday.

June 19, 2009 (bday celeb for Myrel)
 

I love how the 2-day board exam ended with the Transformers 2 movie viewing. I forgot about the board exam while while watching it. Also, after getting out of the theater, I thought the cars I passed by would suddenly transform and attack us or drive us home. :D 

a definition of deviance, from my blue book years back~

"Deviance is problematic, yet essential and intrinsic to any conception of social order."

Q: Why?

Deviance is problematic such that it gives the society a dilemma on how deviance could be prevented, where it came from and why it emerged. It imposes problems such that it endangers the lives of other people (e.g victims of murders, offended people of juvenile delinquents). It is problematic such that it destroys the peace, harmony and the organization of societies. But it is essential to all societies since it celebrates diversity and often lead to a different way of looking at the world. Deviance helps in the society with its (hidden) functions such as provision of jobs for the prevention of deviance, assumption of a sense of identity and individuality, affirmation of cultural norms and values, promotion of social unity, encouragement of social change and clarification of moral boundaries. All this advantages and disadvantages brought by deviance helps in the birth of a society's social order.

We can view this in the following example. Juvenile delinquents are considered deviants and therefore a problem to a society. They imply problem since the offend a party of the population yet they are helpful to social workers, lawyers, and other professions since they are the reasons for providing jobs for such profession. The deviant act also gives a unique identity for the delinquent youth, may it be due to conformity to his friends or the gang he/she belongs to. The deviant behavior also affirms the cultural norm of youth as those who are in school, who studies well and who helps in the development of society in little ways. It promotes social unity since the juvenile delinquents feel belongingness with each other. It may also be viewed as those people working for the prevention of juvenile delinquency being unified in such a goal. It encourages social change since it allows the practitioners to analyze the problems from its roots thus involve solutions such as the alleviation of poverty, advocacy for child betterment, etc. Juvenile delinquency clarifies moral boundaries since it views the deviant act as immoral and those who aren't considered deviant as moral. Juvenile delinquency may be problematic yet is essential to the society in some other way; just like deviance.

~February 13, 2007. Midterm Exam in Social Work 123 (Deviance).

As I read upon it, I never thought I could answer questions backed substantially by theories like that. :) or maybe it was just that exam. teehee~

of coming together and falling apart~

Spending two straight days of my afternoon reading about the origin of the cosmos made me discover an interesting common phenomena of things falling apart - coming together - falling apart then coming together again. It describes a cyclical process whereby it would have no end, and where one can't trace the beginning.

First is the Earth. I remembered my Geology class professor told that the Earth has undergone, undergoing and would undergo many years of land coming together and breaking down again. These are caused by volcanic eruptions at the sea floor, in the middle of plates going against each other and of plates moving away from each other. Observe how the 7 continents are formed from years of these phenomena here:

..and time will come when those continents would again form one huge mass of land but not named as "Pangea" and then fall apart again and form another and so on.

Second is Water. Water also has the cyclical tendency of coming together by virtue of  draining off to rivers, seas and oceans. With the help of heat, water fly to heaven through becoming a vapor and sticks with other water elements until they clutter into clouds and get heavy. They fall apart through rain and then come together again through the same process.

Third is human cells. By conception, cells come together and form tissues into organs into systems into a human. And through the life of the human, they work together in sustaining its life by breaking down food, circulating blood and oxygen, fighting against foreign attackers of the body such as virus, bacteria, etc.. It breaks up at death of the human and die also. Then comes decomposers which take care of  their remnants and who helps them come together with other nutrients and be used as fertilizers bringing up new life in a different form.

Fourth is society. As Karl Marx said, "the history of all hitherto existing society is the history of class struggles". The theory of coming together and falling apart comes in a different level in society where coming together means peace and consensus while falling apart is war and conflict. Society could not have developed and sustained its life until now if there were no conflicting forces and later on agree on a consensus - if this is absent, then development of knowledge through criticism, debate then agreement could not have taken place.

Of coming together and falling apart, I fear the future of people organizations built. The work of social workers is to bring people together to help each other and resolve issues on their own. But will it also come a time when the empowered people's organization face the difficulties of conflict and falling apart? Then maybe, if it so it happens, I wish there would also be a natural or self-induced process of them coming together again. ~.~

my nook in the office~

When Alvin asked me to describe how the office looks like, I simply told him that "hmmm, like a home". The office isn't like the ordinary air-conditioned, white-colored office yet it fits me and I like staying in my nook editing the newsletter. I feel like home, where I could sneak into the kitchen when I feel hungry or just want to take a break by drinking cold water or coffee. In the right is a cabinet for my books though I haven't inserted any since I'm a newbie. The office is even better when my other co-staff are there, laughing around jokes and then in a while, back to their serious paperwork.

My work in ACCE is very different from my fieldwork in my senior year and I still haven't figured out why. The first time I stepped into the office and met the executive sec and finance officer, I felt easy and comfortable with them and the thought of working in ACCE seemed like an unexpected wish come true and I definitely said to myself  "yes, it's social work". Here is the agency's VMG. (from the Operation's Manual)

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a day with Rose Ann

Sometimes friends are the most effective stress-relievers.
Friendship never gets old and lives through years when deeply treasured~ :)

Rose Ann stick up with me the whole day.. even in the extra task in accomplishing my university clearance since mine was pending as I was underassessed in a General Education course in my first year in the university. She was also there when the lady told me that they are not prioritizing any papers since it is not just me that wants the university clearance immediately. I was only asking her if it could be processed immediately since because of days that it was stucked in the processing, my TOR needed for the application for licensure examination was also pending. ~.~ 
 

*Pictures were taken on our way to the Office of the University Registrar. Pictures from UP are a beauty.

After seeing the looongggg line in NSO for request of birth certificate copy-issuance, Rose Ann, Alvin and I decided to request online which only took us about 5 minutes and the travel to BDO where we paid about 20 minutes. Then, Rose Ann and I went back to UP for my clearance and headed to SM North where we paid for a photographer to make us a passport size picture exclusive for the license exam application. It was already late in the afternoon that we finished and so we decided to roam around SM North and try on some good dresses. We definitely enjoyed it after a bunch of munching over fries, coke and 39ers meal of Jollibee. :) If our feets were not hurting, we could have stayed longer but it was and we both feel very tired. Today was a day to cherish since Rose Ann promised to treat me the day she gets her first salary. Weee! =)
 

This is a view from the footbridge where I walked for 10 minutes before getting to the train station that would take me home. It's much more beautiful in the picture, yet it's not... coz you can't touch, smell and feel pollution. ~.~

Habagat and Bagwis~

 

The two dogs above are named Habagat and Bagwis (Habagat - name of wind, Bagwis - wings). They are two stray dogs trained to show an act by the streets. My blockmates and I happened to pass by them on our way to PRC, along Morayta. They look cute, yes they are but actually they look pitiful IRL. The two baskets their mouths hold errr bite are for money given by passerby.
 

Yet, they are more attention grabbers than ordinary beggars one may see in the streets of the Philippines but they also symbolize the situation of some people here: no money, no food, no shelter and in addition, living in the streets. :(
 

editorial comic about new graduates~

This is where I've spent my afternoon, while watching the movie "The International" with Papa. The editorial comic is for ACCE's newsletter which will be published by the end of the month.

The meaning of the comic is easy to figure yet maybe only some few people would understand minute details. The hand is the government headed by Gloria, such a beautiful hand who stayed most in air-conditioned rooms and travels all around the world in pursuit of international relations. The hand holds a few candies symbolizing the government's control over the economy and how little it has done to promote and give job opportunities in the past years. The hand gives candies little by little which are only labeled contractual workers, overseas workers, and call center agents; which are the common job openings here in the Philippines. The rest, I supposed is shown clearly. :)

Credits to enabruha?(that'show I read his sign in an editorial s/he made in 3/31/07, newspaper unknown) where I learned how to draw graduates comically and star-portraits.com where I learned how to draw the hand. So basically, this editorial is a copy-paste from some others' drawings put together to help me portray what I want to express through comic. I'm not very good in drawing by myself. Thanks. :)
 

the first sahod. :)

What an exciting day for getting your first payment from job. Though, I wouldn't take hold of the money for long as I would send it immediately to my brother and Mama at Bicol. badly needed. But even if they don't badly need it this time, I would share a great part of the money earned with my family than spend it all by myself.

Working is fun. Work makes me relearn what my professor thought me in the university and the renumeration, ahhhhh.. the so good money due to hard work, makes it even better. This is the start of paying back the hardships my parents undergone to help me finish college. :)

wish I could be a child again~

When I was a child I slept at afternoons and some other times, I sneak out of the house to play with children of my age. When I was a child, I didn't care what food I ate, if there were nutrients or not and I was given the privilege to eat sweets limitlessly. When I was a child, I care about the world less as I was contented in my own little world of play, of TV and of thinking of shallow things, of spending time with Papa and of messing with my brother. As I grow old, I had become so inclined in knowing about the world, its systems and why things got the way it is.. and now I feel tired just thinking about these things. Somehow, I wish I had little knowledge about it then I would have an excuse not to think of solution to these ill-gotten problems. But it's not the way I want it to be, humans have lifelines and mine has gotten into its middle, as I believe it to be. I feel like I will never feel the same innocence, contentment and happiness in simplicity back when I was young. When I was a child, I looked forward on what my future would be and now that I've grown, I regret having gone to the present.

because i miss you so much

Pika looks really cute in this picture that's why I love it yet he told me that he doesn't like it since he looks like gay. I think otherwise. ~.~

This is a back post so I can't pretty much say what happened on this day but what I can remember is that I've had so many moody moments on that day yet Pika never walked away from me. He just walked beside me, held my hand and kept quiet while we were walking and I was pissed-off. After we claimed the pictures from a photo shop, I smiled a little and then got moody again. That's when we passed by a pet shop and he suggested that we look around the shop, "i haven't took you here, have i?". My mood suddenly changed after seeing fishes, the lazy siamese cat which I would love to have as a pet and the golden retriever whom Jeric proposed to buy in exchange of his Flyff character. I refused. ~.~ But I'll never forget how he managed to think of a way to lighten me up and kept patient amidst my mood swings. <3

This is the picture I keep in my wallet and in moments with nothing to do or when I'm tired, I look at it and remember how patient Pika is with me in our relationship. I miss you. ILY. <3

career dilemma~

I got sad on the news that Chuck would not have Season 3 while I've now grown fond of Sarah and her cuteness. And Chuck some kinda resembles Jeric and his personality yet a little less talkative. What I love with Chuck is the gadgets, that I would like to also have one and the idea of being a spy, oh so cool. In the Philippines though, there are no spies or CIA or so I think.

On my way home, I again thought of my future, of what I'm going to be or what job I would stay in. I learned that my friend who was a batch a year older than I, is now a medical social worker which I was planning and wanting to be since my freshmen year in Social Work. And I looked back on my dream *an impossible dream* of me being a doctor. If I would like to be a doctor, a pedia specifically, I better start medschool this school year yyyeeetttt I errr we don't have money for med education. So then, if I was a medical social worker, I'll be working in a hospital which is still close to the profession I dream of, or so I believe. Pondering on that, I better then continue on the path of being a development worker, CO, macro social work though I still am uncomfortable of the thought. I wish I could have been like Sarah who was good in martial arts and be recruited in CIA, but then again, impppoosssible.~

What I'll be in five years? Still have no idea.
But most definitely,  I'll still rest my shoulder in social work.

For today, I enjoyed translating to Syohe what he hears from the gathering of workers, farmers, women and youth in this not-so-holiday May 1st. I guess I'll have to concentrate on the present and let the future by itself.

today's randomness~

I've realized just this morning that memories are brought up by distinct scent. I've tried to use the perfume I had last semester and the minute I inhaled its scent, I told myself "amoy Flyff!". I sniffed my present cologne, "San Juan, Batangas!" came up, and my favorite perfume last year retold a past that I wouldn't want to visit again (errr,  I remembered my ex).  So it's fun to try different perfumes/colognes to insert bits of memories into different scents.

 

Finally, I now know what cream puffs taste like. I've been wondering its taste since I first saw Soushi-kun eat one at Zettai Kareshi. And I validated that the CRAM puff sold in Bahay ng Alumni was actually cream puff, a lady explained that the sign outside their pastry house was just mistaken.

 

Perfumes and cream puffs , things I enjoy in my personal life. Now that I'm working at ACCE, I found joy in the little things I do for myself and most importantly, I've now learned how important saving is. The story about ACCE and how I got the job would be in another blog post. =)

vacation mode still~

Still no news about my application for ACCE (Aspiring Citizens for Community Empowerment). *takes note that she needs to inquire about it yet tomorrow*. Personally, I still lack confidence that I could perform the position offered to me, training and advocacy officer. I enjoyed our training subjects and in my fieldwork in Batangas, conduct of trainings were the activities I feel most fulfilled after it has taken place yet I still am not confident to take on tasks on advocacy. Being young, I don't know if anyone would believe what would come out of my mouth and as I remember last last year I've given up on being outspoken since it was difficult to explain when nobody's listening.

 

I've yet to accomplish my university clearance, take hold of Transcript of Records and Diploma but I want to have a job this early. The board exam is another thing. On second thought, I must finish all these tasks first before experiencing work firsthand and I'm still nervous about it. I also realized today that it would be important to choose my first agency as a professional social worker wisely since it may hinder or facilitate what's in store for me in the future.

 

Oh, I've learned from Zettai Kareshi that the future is also the present. If one is happy in the present then definitely he or she would also be happy in the future. I am still reflecting on it though. *back to watching Zettai Kareshi, am still in vacationmode* :)

lovemode~

What is L<3ve but a friend who just remained beside me and never once let go of my hand.


had a day with Jeric so basically that's what got me into posting this,
my Flyff forum's sig btw. xD

Well, come. :)

Errrrr. I recently finished my requirements for fieldwork. And yeah, I might be working as a social worker soon. I was riding a tricycyle, just after when my fieldwork partner and I (with another research assistant), just finished an ocular visit to a working place of someone who makes suman and tamales at Batangas. Uhh well, that's when I thught of putting up this weblog. And I think it would make me inspire to do the tasks of being a good social worker.

About me: I'm Kristiane, 19 years old. One sibling. One mother. One Father, One love (Pika!!). :D On vacant hours, I play FLyff, read manga, plurrrkkk~  and facebook, practice playing teh guitar and read. There's so many things I want to do in my life yet I don't have enough time to do all of them.

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